Let them eat CAKE!

This past Sunday a few friends of mine and I got together and had the best party ever, a cake party!!
The idea got thrown out there a few days prior when someone mentioned having cake for breakfast. Over 60+ replies later to her status, the cake party idea was born. We ended up having 5 people there and the cakes were sooo yummy!! We had a Black Russian cake, a Butter Brickle cake, Coconut Layer cake, Strawberry layer cake and I made a Lemonade Layer cake.
After we started to come out of our sugar coma, we have decided that it is now going to be a once a month thing, with a different dessert every month. Pies, cookies, ice creams, candies, trifles, etc. You get the point! I can't wait to see what we do next month. It was so much fun to just sit around and talk with everyone. We were there over 3 hours and didn't even realize it, oops!
Here is my recipe that I used and will be making a lot more I can tell, I loved it! When Ethan got a piece later on he said it was lemonicious!

Lemonade Layer Cake



Cake:
1 1/3 cups granulated sugar
6 tablespoons butter, softened
1 tablespoon grated lemon rind
3 tablespoons thawed lemonade concentrate
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
2 large eggs
2 large egg whites
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1 1/4 cups fat-free buttermilk (I couldn't find FF so I used regular and it was fine)
Cooking spray

Frosting:
2 tablespoons butter, softened
2 teaspoons grated lemon rind
2 teaspoons thawed lemonade concentrate
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
8 ounces 1/3-less-fat cream cheese
3 1/2 cups powdered sugar

Preheat oven to 350°.

To prepare cake, place first 5 ingredients in a large bowl; beat with a mixer at medium speed until well blended (about 5 minutes). Add eggs and egg whites, 1 at a time, beating well after each addition. Lightly spoon flour into dry measuring cups; level with a knife. Combine flour, baking powder, salt, and baking soda; stir well with a whisk. Add flour mixture and buttermilk alternately to sugar mixture, beginning and ending with flour mixture; beat well after each addition.

Pour batter into 2 (9-inch) round cake pans coated with cooking spray; sharply tap pans once on counter to remove air bubbles. Bake at 350° for 20 minutes or until wooden pick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool in pans 10 minutes on a wire rack; remove from pans. Cool completely on wire rack.

To prepare frosting, place 2 tablespoons butter and the next 4 ingredients (2 tablespoons butter through cream cheese) in a large bowl; beat with a mixer at high speed until fluffy. Add powdered sugar, and beat at low speed just until blended (do not overbeat). Chill 1 hour.

Place 1 cake layer on a plate; spread with 1/2 cup frosting. Top with remaining cake layer. Spread remaining frosting over top and sides of cake. Store cake loosely covered in the refrigerator.

So tired...

I am not even sure if I am going to publish this post, I think I just need to write it all out...to get it off my chest.
I was talking with a really great friend lately, telling her about some of the stuff I have been going through, etc and getting her feedback. I love her cause she will tell me the TRUTH! She won't bullshit with me, which I love about her. If she is mad at me, has a problem, or feels the need to call me out about something, she will! I need more of her in my life I have decided!!
Anyways...
The past year and a half has been crazy, and after talking to her, seems like most of it was all caused by things I did, and not necessarily on purpose, but regardless.
I had a really crappy time in middle school and high school. I know it was mostly because I was super shy and quiet which translated to snobby and unwilling to talk to people. I had a great group of people in my cosmetology class that I bonded with in 11th & 12th grade that really helped. But even then, some of them I never really fit in with. I am not saying this in a pity post, just telling some past.
So after I had Ethan I met a few girls on a board and became friends with them. Then the group split, I was in the middle, Swiss you could say. I hated that and felt I needed to "play both sides", so I would say one thing to one group, yet a completely different thing to the other group, trying to make everyone happy and fit in with everyone.
For as long as I can remember I have wanted to fit in, no matter what, and it never worked. Yet here I was, with a bunch of friends, saying and doing whatever I needed to to fit in. Was I lying? At that time, I honestly didn't think it was lying, I was just "bending the truth" right? Yeah, not so much. As my friend so nicely put it, lying is lying, no matter your intention behind it. Wow, she is right.
As time went on, things really changed and I felt like I needed to do more to fit it, I didn't want to lose my friends, and I was going to do whatever I needed to to fit in. There started the problem. I lost a lot of friends, and it was all my fault. I know there is nothing I can do about it, I was the one who messed it up, and now I have to deal with that. The only thing I can do is say I am sorry and that I am trying to just be ME now, which I know some people may not like, but man will it be a lot easier on me. Do I email everyone I know I hurt, angered, pissed off and tell them I am sorry? Heck at this point I have lost count. I'm sure there are people that aren't too thrilled with me, but will they actually tell me? I hope so, I really do hate who I *was*.
I have been doing an awesome bible study the last few weeks and it is really opening up my eyes. I know that I need to be happy with myself and the life I have right now and I really am working on that. My poor husband has had to deal with me being constantly worried about what other people are thinking about me, if people are looking, etc. I was at a point where I could only have fun and be myself around people if I had a few drinks to loosen up. That provided it's own set of problems, who knows what I would say when I was drinking?
Now I am rambling. The whole point of this post is that I have been a really crappy friend and person to be around the last few years and for that I am truly sorry. If I hurt you, I am sorry. If I lied to you, I am sorry. If I was fake around you, I am sorry. I am sorry for everything I have done. I know these are just words, but they are truly coming from my heart.
I hope this post doesn't upset anyone with me, but I feel like I needed to post this.
My goal this year is learn to be me, and believe me, that is truly a learning process for me. I have a long way to go...

Easter is springing up in our house!

Ethan decided today that we needed to start decorating for Easter. We got our tub out of the storage area and started pulling stuff out. I pulled out the boys two new Easter baskets that I bought for them last year:
Then once I started pulling everything else out, I noticed this basket, once I bought about 4-5 yrs ago at Target when they put all the Easter stuff on 90% off...I think I paid about $2 maybe for it. It is a perfect match to the boys...looks like Avery has an Easter basket already! Guess I was always meant to have a little girl huh? :)

Ethan=speechless mommy

So, Ethan may/may not have broken one of our Wii-motes from fooling around. I told him if it was broken, we were taking some of his money in his fun spending account to replace it. He looked at me and with a little *attitude* told me
"It was NOT GOING TO HAPPEN! That money is being saved so I can buy you something pretty...don't you want pretty & nice things mommy? So thats why I get to keep my money...cause otherwise you get nothing and then you will be sad and you don't want to be sad do you mommy?

::insert eye roll from mommy off to the side::

What do you say to that?